Do you belong to the people who honor RESPECT, FAIRNESS and APPRECIATION as their key-values? Values that guide your interaction with others and that you think of as important success factors?

For most of my coachees that is the case. Especially for my female coachees the “Magic Three” are key. At the same time they struggle with a lack of respect, appreciation and fairness when it comes to people dealing with them.

If that is your case, too, let me share a simple equation with you: 

99-1 ≠ 100

If you feel treated with lack of respect, fairness and appreciation, it could be that you have taken yourself out of the equation.

It is impossible to reach 100% if a crucial factor in the equation – YOU! – is missing. If you do not attribute to yourself,  as naturally as to all others, the same amount of respect, fairness and appreciation, you will never get the Magic Three for yourself. It is like cutting a cake in equal pieces and throwing one of them – YOURS! – into the garbage instead of letting it melt deliciously on your tounge. The immediate consequence of that behaviour is that you won’t eat your piece of cake. And the long-term consequence will be that – well, you won’t eat enough. And so you starve. Metaphorically you will starve to death. And that will be the moment when you quit your job – out of frustration to never get what you need while you give so much, continuously.

So if you feel that is your case, start asking yourself whether you attribute the same amount of fairness, respect and appreciation to yourself as to others.

Only if that is the case, the equation will be correct. If that is not your case, put this equation down on a post-it and stick in to your computer, into your wallet or to your mirror. Change starts with AWARENESS – and most importantly: it starts IMMEDIATELY.

This post is also available in: German